Spring is upon us. Leave are turning green, flowers are blooming and the campus is coming back to life. People are waking up from their winter hibernation and stepping into the sunlight once again. With rebirth and renewal, comes Love. Even Nature has a funny way of showing it’s own version of love. Just watch the squirrels chase each other around campus and you will see what I am talking about. Or just listen to the flock of birds when you wake up in the morning… They are a great alarm clock. The thing about love on a college campus, is most of the time, it’s not real. So many times college love is unfaithful because of the lack of real commitment.
Cheating on someone your dating, or cheating with someone who is in a relationship is terrible. I am not going to sit here and criticize anyone for their choices because most of us, including myself, are not innocent but I do feel regret. I did not cheat but I was a part of it on the other side. Neither of us meant for it to go where it did, but it happened and for that I do feel regret. Here is the problem I have with most of the relationships I see on the campus. After cheating, you can not say “I love you” or “I still love them”. “You do not love someone who you cheat on or plan to cheat on. The “I love you” should be kept out of your mouth and saved for that one person you would never risk losing for just one goodnight” (anonymous) Cheating is a choice, not a mistake. Nothing about it is all right. For those of you who have been cheated on, get out. For those of who who have cheated, stop hurting that person and let go. “Just because you have a past with someone does not mean you should have a future with them.” By staying with the past, you are only hurting yourself and that person. It is not fair to that person or to yourself to try and save something that was already ruined. And yes, I do believe that a relationship is ruined when cheating happens. Relationships are about commitment and trust. If you cannot follow those two ideals, than a relationship is not for you.
The good thing about college though, is that relationships don’t have to be permanent. There is no written law that says you have to date that person for the rest of your life. Even if you're in a relationship, feelings can be lost. That is human and you can let go. Sometimes you need to take a chance and never look back. There is always an excuse of why someone refuses to move on or move forward. I hear all the time people say that it's just not the right time, or I want to be single, or I am still in love with that person, or I just loved him so much. First, sometimes, you fall in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time. So don’t fight it when it comes along. Love only knocks so often and if you constantly slam your door on it, then there is a chance it may never knock again. Secondly, “There is no such word as loved, love has no past tense. If you ever stop loving someone, then you truly never loved them in the first place.” This is a quote by an anonymous source that screams the truth. How can you stop loving someone if you never even loved them in the first place? Speaking from a college student's point of view, I truly believe that many of us have never known what love actually has felt like. Many of us are still searching and some may have found it without even knowing.
The future can be scary and unsure, but you never know what it holds until you experience it yourself. Most people if they truly are the right person, don’t care about your past. They just want a place in your future. The heart has reasons that reason cannot know. (Netflix) Things happen for a reason and we may never know why. But love is a part of life. Someone once wrote, “I’m proud of my heart. Its been played, cheated, burned and broken, but somehow still works.” Many of us can relate. No one ever said life or love was going to be easy. Everyone talks about how college is the best days of your life. Honestly I think people say this because it was a time where everything didn't matter.The hardest decisions you had to make in life was which research paper you were going to do first, or whether to eat at Richie or Caine. Here is the thing. Relationships are complicated. They are meant to be treated with respect and care. Always have been and always will be.
Although the fog is thick and hazed over campus, there are bright spots that shine through. Many of us see the future married couples. We also see people that have newer relationships that provide hope for the rest. They demonstrate how friendship and love should be and should look like. Spring is here and love is in the air. Don’t mess around and screw it up. “Realize now that when your heart breaks, you gotta fight like hell, to make sure your still alive. Because you are. And that pain you feel? That’s life. That confusion and fear? That’s there to remind you, that somewhere out there, is something better and that something is worth fighting for.” (OTH)
One day you will say the words "I Do".... Make them count.